it’s probably going to be weird writing this here. esp with my back to the area where folks can walk by. current priorities: staying warm, not privacy of my shitty writing.
had… a talk w/r this morning? it went much more smoothly and without fanfare than i might have expected, and i didn’t ask quite the questions i was thinking i would. instead of “do you like the way we fuck?” it was something like “do I ever make you feel put-upon or expected to have sex?” and it was…. really nice bc his answer actually included context and answered more than just the straight question in a way that answered the questions i didn’t ask. like, i feel more capable of not taking it personally when we don’t end up fucking, at least for the immediate future. and for my part of things, it probably means something like…. be more forward if you want it. and communicate your shit. which both seem very obvious, but are easier to do when i don’t think i’m going to somehow make things worse/less likely overall by asking in the first place.