hmm. sitting outside makes it easier to do stuff, but also that Feeling Of Being Watched.
r’s still on the clock for his new job and needs time/space to himself, so i’m out here. it’s not bad, kind of overcast rn.
i should…. look for volunteer opportunities and learning opportunities. i also told M that i’d help her look up some non-judgmental info + resources wrt covid, bc apparently she’s been avoiding learning about it due to fear of judgment and starting later than everyone… the usual m feels. i get it. or at least, i guessed it. so looking into that would be a good thing to do. i haven’t heard from her at all today, so she’s probably in hella avoidance mode. fuck. please get your health insurance together, dude…. i know talking is scary but being evicted is scarier. or not being evicted, but falling behind on payments. you have eric as a safety net, but b&t don’t have anything. also you and i are 2/3 of the renewed lease signatures/ppl on the hook if we don’t pay.
*messages*
that one newsletter my sib follows is a resource for things i could/should be doing.
maybe i should look into making more diy respirators, more masks.
home things: fold laundry, clean room, check what my chore is this week, use grbn before they can get grosser…. if r wants hot pot, i could make some kind of rich broth w/24 hr notice… i’m interested in more veg tho.
oh, and pt stuff. my back was tight all by itself today. back to having to intentionally engage better muscles.
home improvement…. at some point this week, r wants to get a different desk and change his work setup in his room. i figure whenever that happens, we’ll probably go to the type of store where i can take care of LED strips and uhhhhhh GOD what was the other thing I needed? jfc
i think i should pay rent and see about making some smaller donations. i sense upcoming utilities bs for this house and i don’t want to be unprepared.
also, …. just…. we’re in one of the worst timelines.
but but but. aside from that… ugh i know i keep being all over the place with this post, i’m having trouble knowing how to organize this… today has actually been pretty good to me. lots of draws, not too many issues. was sleepy so we all went on an sbux run, i got a dirty pumpkin spice chai latte which came out to almost $8. i wasn’t sure if they remembered the shots just based on how it tasted, but i started “coming up” right around the last draw and it’s still making my throat feel tight. also a reliable indicator? chai doesn’t make your pee smell Like That. lmao
i’ve been getting lunch from one place pretty reliably lately, they have an online ordering option but no tipping functionality, i finally messaged the company to be like “yo i want to give your workers more money, please let me tip them online, i have no cash” and their response was basically like… “oh don’t worry about our workers, we’re taking care of them with internal ‘rewards’ and ‘bonuses’ 🙂 anyway here’s a $25 gift card!” like. holy shit. free lunch money for asking if i can give you more money? what. so i guess i’m asking the store employees if i should just tip in cash when i go to pick up tomorrow.
last week, i started making a powerpoint for prospective therapists. it’s useful for gathering my thoughts, but i’m realizing as i make it that it’s probably too much for introductory purposes, and i should only cover a little tiny bit of it at first. maybe whoever i end up with, i can give it to them, but it needs to be even more abridged. i’m also like… worried that it’s the wrong time to start seeing a therapist. what if shit pops off a month and some change from now? what if m really needs financial help? i’ve had really bad luck with therapists so far.